Awkward/Awesome

I've been wanting to do an awkward/awesome post for a really long time now. But I have never been able to remember all the things that have happened to me in a week. This week was just an abnormally eventful week so I deemed it appropriate to finally fulfill this dream of mine.

Awkward:

~ Here is the scene: My theology professor thinks that it is okay to assign mandatory reading, that he makes clear will not be referenced ever again in class. So of course, nobody does it. The first exam rolls around, and at the very end we see this: 

Thanks to this curveball, I got a 78% on the test. Sweeeeeeeet

~ I don't know if I've mentioned this, but I am currently working in the athletic training room at my school. As you could imagine, we have plenty of awkward moments in there from wrapping a basketball player's groin, to massaging the coach's shin splints, to icing a sweaty shoulder (and having to walk under the 7 foot Aussie's armpit in the process). But never in a million years would I expect this: A soccer player comes in, bloody and walking stiff legged. We can't figure out where the blood is coming from, until he turns around and drops his pants. Someway, somehow, he jumped, hit the fence, and on the way down it caught and gave him a nice, deep, fleshy cut down the crack of his gluteus maximus. 

Having to clean and dress a grown man's behind? Up there in the top ten most awkward moments of my life. Probably in his too.

 I totally would have taken a picture for you guys, but because of confidentiality laws, I can't. I've probably said too much already. But it's so worth it.

 I painted you a picture so you can get an idea of what it was like. Hope it's not too graphic.

~ I have this lizard family that lives in my front yard. I used to like them. I would see them scurry around when I drove up, and it would make me really happy that they are thriving in my yard.

 I'm not gonna lie I've even thought about making a house for them with food in it. 

That thought didn't last long.. 

Anyways, I was walking into my house yesterday and maybe it was the opening of the screen door, or my neighbor's dog barking, but the big daddy of my lizard family, literally FLEW onto me. I thought I was going to die. And what made it worse is that he would not get off no matter how much I screamed or flailed or made a complete idiot of myself. Needless to say the house with food is not an option any more.

Sidenote to that story: I'm a little nervous at my neighbor's reaction..which was nothing. Good to know that if a serial killer ever breaks into my house, my screams will go unnoticed.

Awesome:

~Having my best friend from high school come over spontaneously and make black bean burgers with me. Remind me to share the recipe soon, they were delish. 

~Making baby steps towards becoming organized! This week: Folded my paper and plastic bags, and put all my loose pantry clutter into mason jars. Productive? I think yes.

~Watching an episode of bones on Netflix and seeing the baby face version of one of my best friends from high school. And I never knew he was such a celebrity. Had I known, I feel like I could have capitalized on that friendship...

Just kidding I'm not like that. 

~ Tomorrow is the weekend!!!! Gah I love life.

Happy Friday loved ones!